A Funny Circumstance
by Adelie King
Summary: Major Samantha Carter is panicked she may have done something with her CO Colonel Jack O'Neill during a drunken team get together she shouldn't have...
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Stargate SG1, characters, settings etc. are property of their owners. No copyright infringement is intended. Original characters and plots are property of the author. No profit is being made from the fiction.

**Funny Circumstance**  
by Adelie King

**Chapter One: Drunken Night**

It was within the first year of the formation of SG1 and the team was over at Colonel Jack O'Neill's for a get together. Daniel Jackson, Captain Samantha Carter and Teal'c had all been relaxing and having a good time.

Daniel, Sam and Jack had few drinks and were tipsy. They were laughing at stupid crap and watching a movie. Teal'c sat amused watching the stupidity of his human team mates. He just grinned his slight grin as he watched Jackson near pass out time. He inquired, "Shall I return Daniel Jackson to his place of residence?"

O'Neill smiled in response sitting next to Carter with his arm around her like buddies. "Go ahead big guy…" He waved as he and Sam laughed in her case giggled.

Teal'c then rose and inquired putting Daniel Jackson's arm over his shoulder, "Shall I escort Samantha Carter home as well?" He knew his friends were inebriated and this could lead his team mates to trouble.

"No thank you…I'll be fine Teal'c." She answered politely with that bright smile of hers and looked at Jack.

"Are you two not concerned about how Carter remaining is going to appear to those in your military?" He inquired.

They were so drunk O'Neill waved, "She'll be fine…I have a spare bedroom with locks on it." He joked and slid down on the sofa laughing. He added, "I've had so much I doubt I could get it up anyway."

Sam giggled covering her mouth with her body leaning down her head falling on his lap. He started stirring in his pants immediately.

"If you say so O'Neill…" Teal'c trusted them but didn't as he walked Daniel to the door. Before he left he added, "Remember that I did advise you…" Jack just waved him out still laughing.

Carter laughed and informed him, "You obviously didn't have that much to drink Sir." She saw the tent in his pants and observed, "Your tent is bigger than the ones we use off world." She laughed harder and him with her.

"Too bad we can't camp all night in it." He joked and she got off him slipping on to the floor going for her wine glass on the coffee table.

Sam drank down her glass and remarked, "I could…" She looked over her shoulder licking her lips. "I think I'll crawl in…"

His eyes went flat and his face showed some panic as his 2IC command moved to his pants. This game had gone too far. O'Neill's eyes wandered back and forth a moment as she unbuckled his belt. "Uh Carter…" He asked swallowing, "What are you doing?" He scooted pushing back with his hands on the couch.

"What do you think Sir?" Carter smiled with a naughty look in her eye, "Checking our tent to make sure it's prepared for the night."

His eyes grew and his jaw slacked. Jack asked joking nervously, "What are you doing checking my weapon?"

"Yeah…" She unzipped his pants sliding the zipper slowly, "Can't have it going off accidentally. I need to disarm it." Her hand was about to reach in.

O'Neill was sweating and rubbed his hand down his face, "Uh Carter…I don't think that's necessary…" Her hand wrapped around him in his pants. His body slid and his head fell back in weakness. "Oh God…"

"You've got a nice big gun here…" Sam's hand moved up his shaft around his tip. "I'd better take care of it." She moved as if to put her mouth on him in his pants.

His dick screamed at him for her to continue even though his brain knew otherwise. Jack was about to do something. His eyes squeezed shut as he waited for her mouth to take him in. Then he never felt her mouth on him.

His eyes opened slowly one opening first. O'Neill saw her motionless, "Carter?" He heard her quietly snoring. Her head was laying on his lap and she was asleep. He looked up at the ceiling and let his breath out sighing with relief, "Oh thank God." Jack gently moved her not to wake her onto the floor a moment and re-zipped himself.

His dick screamed _No! You idiot! _O'Neill's gentleman mind ordered _Shut up you dick head! _He picked her up and carried her down the hall to the spare bedroom. He laid her on one side of the queen size bed and pulled down the covers on the other side. Then he politely undressed her down to her panties and t-shirt and slid her under the blankets.

Jack pulled the covers around her and placed her clothes on the chair against the wall. When the door was shut, he sighed relief again leaning against the door. Then he looked down at the bulge tenting his pants. _I'll deal with you now! _His tone in his mind was angry as if chewing out a kid. O'Neill went to bed himself to sleep it off and took care of personal business.

The next morning Samantha Carter woke up in a strange bed and panicked. She looked around and then peaked under the covers. She saw she was in her pink t-shirt and panties but her bra was now off. Sam felt between her legs finding herself drenched. Not knowing what happened she got out of bed and got her white jeans on and her bra.

Then she suddenly had a memory flash into her head of her unzipping the Colonel's pants. Carter touched her aching head from the hang over, "Oh my God? What have I done?" She panicked to herself and got her sandals on. "Where am I?" Sam wondered and left the room quickly. She saw the hall and recalled it was O'Neill's hall.

Carter smelled coffee brewing and pancakes cooking as she wandered past the kitchen. She saw her purse on the table and plotted to grab it and get out before Jack saw her. Sam then recalled her hand going in his fly and the feeling of his manhood in her hand. She started blushing.

O'Neill looked up and smiled brightly greeting, "Morning sleepyhead…want some coffee and breakfast?" He looked back down and added, "Maybe some Ibprophin?"

She saw the smile on his face and blushed so badly frozen in place a moment. Jack started approaching with a full mug in one hand and some pills in the other. Nervously she answered, "Uh…I think I'll just go…" Then she made an excuse, "I have a lot of work to do…"

He was about to ease her conscious about the night before when she had quickly scurried out his front door, "Uh Carter…" O'Neill called to her but she was already gone. He set the mug and pills down and figured it was best to let her calm down and then tell her after that.

Carter came through her front door slowly, shut it and then sank down on her sofa with humiliation her hands planted in her lap. _Oh my God…I blew my CO…" _Her face buried in her hands. _What am I going to do? How can I look him in the face again? _Sam sat in shockfor a long while _My career is ruined…_ She panicked internally.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Stargate SG1, characters, settings etc. are property of their owners. No copyright infringement is intended. Original characters and plots are property of the author. No profit is being made from the fiction.

**Funny Circumstance**  
by Adelie King

**Chapter Two: Jumping To Conclusions**

It was Monday morning and Carter had just gotten changed into her BDU's when O'Neill walked in. She looked him in the face looking mortified. He looked at her back with a straight expression of discomfort. Jack politely greeted her, "Morning Carter…"

Sam took a breath looking away, "Morning Sir…"

He set his jacket on the bench and opened his locker pulling his BDU's for the day out. Jack knew he was going to have to tell her nothing really happened…almost nothing… He looked at her with a serious expression but felt himself starting to smile at how funny she was going to find this when she was relieved. "Carter…we…"

"I know Sir…" Sam's voice had embarrassment in it. "We did something foolish Saturday and I was stupid…"

"We were drunk Carter…" O'Neill explained to her to calm her. "We weren't thinking and were just fooling around…" His statement sounded innocent.

She turned around slamming the locker shut agreeing, "Oh I say we were…" Her hand covered her newest flush across her body. Ashamed she sank to the bench, "I can't believe I did that and to my CO…" Carter then predicted, "We are so screwed…"

"Not really…" Jack remarked in a way that if she was listening she would've realized nothing really happened.

"How can you say that?" She was standing again freaking out calmly, "We…" Sam looked down his groin out of instinct and turned her back to him, "Oh my God…" Her hand was closed in front of her mouth.

"Carter it wasn't that bad…" He assured her.

Carter commented, "Oh I'm sure to you it wasn't…" She just looked back with her eyes.

O'Neill wanted to laugh but knew he couldn't. He was holding his grin in though and asked, "We had fun for a while though…right?"

"Well at least you can remember…" Carter reminded him, "I have no memory of it except…" The memory of her about to go down on him flashed again. Then she realized she hadn't given head that much in her life and remarked, "I must have sucked…"

"Not really…you didn't suck…" Jack just told her nothing happened again in the tone as before.

"Well at least that's some relief." She commented sarcastically to ease her embarrassment a little. "I'm glad to know I didn't let you down."

"If you did I would've told you…believe me." He was starting to have fun and he smiled again and clarified, "Carter…you didn't do anything…"

Sam turned around and assumed, "Well obviously I did or you wouldn't have that smile on your face."

_This is going to take all day _Jack thought and repeated, "I mean you didn't do anything…" He assured her, "Nothing happened…"

It finally got through her thick genius head and she reacted a moment before asking, "Nothing happened?"

"No…nothing major…" O'Neill explained, "You passed out before anything happened and then I took you to bed…" That didn't come out right. Her eyes grew and he smugly told her, "Believe me if something happened you would've never forgotten I assure you."

Sam then clarified, "So I didn't go down on you?" She waited for his answer.

"No…you passed out on my lap and I carried you to the spare room, took off some of your clothes and put you in the bed recovering you." Jack explained and then covered his forehead and eyes realizing how it came out.

"Then why do I remember getting into your pants?" Carter panicked and thought hard, "I know I touched you."

He was getting frustrated his arms dropping straight. "Carter…if you touched me I'd recall it with clarity." O'Neill then added, "I stopped you first and you passed out." He was praying he wouldn't have to tell her the rest.

Sam was relived but still unconvinced.

He finally told her, "Carter…we'll discuss this later…now stop worrying and let me get dressed." He waved her out of the locker room.

Carter left carrying her button up cover top. She was more confused than ever even though he said nothing happened. How far had she gone and wondered. Jack had a feeling he was going to have to use reverse psychology to fix this situation.

During the rest of the day Sam concentrated more on remembering that night than her research. Visions came to her of touching his dick in his pants and her memory started adding things. She saw herself sucking him out of his fly even though it didn't completely happen. This put Sam into a more embarrassed panic.

Carter was thinking the right thing to do would be to admit what she did to Hammond and take the punishment. She was an honorable woman and needed to get this off her chest. Now she debated how to tell him so she decided to tell Janet Frasier and get advice.

Meanwhile Jack O'Neill not knowing what to do decided to ask for help himself. He decided Daniel was his best help available. When he got to Jackson's lab, Jackson looked up and asked, "Hey Jack…Did you need help with something?"

"Yeah…you could say that…" O'Neill's hands tucked in his pockets and he strolled into the lab closing the door behind him. "It's about Carter…we did something stupid because we got drunk bad and…"

Daniel's eyes grew and he asked, "Jack what happened?" Jack's expression made it look worse than it was. "Jack…You didn't…"

"No we didn't and that's my problem…" He explained to Daniel, "Carter thinks we did…"

"Did you tell her that?" Jackson inquired knowing this was serious.

"Yes…she wouldn't listen or believe me…" Jack explained panicked further.

"What exactly does she think you did?" Daniel asked.

"She thinks she blew me when she was drunk after you and Teal'c left." He told him flat out, "She didn't and she didn't listen to me…"

"What made Sam convinced she did…something had to cause her to think that Jack." Jackson pointed out to him logically. "Now please tell me everything you remember happened."

There was no getting out of it now so he began, "We were drunk…I made a joke I couldn't function if I wanted to because of being drunk." Jack paused and continued, "Of course as Teal'c was leaving with you." He rubbed the back of his head and began blushing, "I get a huge boner in my pants tenting them. She joked my tent was bigger than any off world…"

Daniel was looking at him with a confused expression now. O'Neill continued, "I made a comment that it was too bad we couldn't share it…Carter counteracts that she could and begins to undo my pants."

Jackson's eyes grew and he asked, "Then what happened?"

"I moved to stop her and her hand was grabbing me inside my fly and she joked about my big weapon was and disarming it."

"So she did do something to make her believe she did." Daniel inquired as he put the situation together. "Then what?"

"Just before she was going to go down on me…"Jack told him almost theatrically, "She passed out cold on my lap." He took a breath and continued, "I took her to bed, removed her clothes and covered her." He waited for a response and finished, "She slept alone there until morning, greeted me and left…panicked. That's it I assure you."

"Did you tell her everything Jack?" Jackson asked directly already knowing the answer.

"I tried." O'Neill defended, "But Carter was so set in her mind that something happened that nothing I said got through to her." He was frustrated, "You know how Carter can be when she sets her mind to something."

"Yeah I know…" Daniel agreed with O'Neill and sat contemplating the situation.

After a minute Jack inquired, "So what should I do to make her listen to me?"

Jackson thought and inquired, "Did she see you?" He tapped his pencil against his mouth contemplating something.

"Of course she did…I talked to her this morning…" O'Neill replied.

"No I mean did she see you…" Daniel looked down in emphasis with his eyes, "You know…"

"No…she handled me a little in my pants but it was brief…why?" Jack wanted to know where he was going with this.

"If she had gone down on you she would have to have seen you…correct?" He inquired to get him on his train of logic.

"Yeah…" Sometimes Jack could be dense. "Of course she'd have to see me to do that…why?"

Jackson suggested, "Have her be logical and ask her if she did it to describe your…equipment to you…" He paused and continued, "If it happened…knowing her with that photographic memory of hers. She could give you a complete detailed description of it…"

O'Neill was following now, "Oh…" He thought about his idea and that it was a good one but then asked, "Would I have to show it to her?" His eyebrows went up, "After she described it?"

Daniel's eyes went back and forth and he replied, "Hopefully not…I don't think she'd like you whipping out for her…" He paused and predicted, "She might think you're requesting another one."

"Well desperate times call for desperate measures Daniel…" Jack then told him, "Thanks for the suggestion..." He was at the door and added, "Hopefully I don't have to get desperate to convince her…" Then he left.

Meanwhile Carter had gone to see Janet Frasier in her office. She knocked on the door and asked upset, "Janet, can I talk to you?"

"Sure Sam," She stood up seeing Carter upset and guided her in automatically shutting the office door. "What's wrong?"

Sam sat down ashamed looking down at her lap, "Janet…I did something really stupid Saturday night."

"I know you got drunk and stayed at Colonel O'Neill's to sleep it off." She heard from Daniel and Teal'c but didn't have the details yet.

"Yeah…" Sam looked at Janet and looked down at her lap blushing.

"I take it was something more than that…" Frasier observed Carter's discomfort. Her friend nodded keeping herself not crying. Then she inquired calmly, "What happened?" Sam's silence was deafening and she added, "Okay…what exactly did happen?" She knew this was serious and remained calm as usual.

"I got drunk…really drunk…and…" Carter trailed off a moment and finished, "I think I may have gone down on him…" She covered her face as before.

"You think you…may…have gone down on him…" She repeated and Sam nodded ashamed again. "What do you mean you think…?" Janet leaned forward and asked, "Don't you remember?" Sam shook her head and she inquired logically, "Than how do you know for sure?"

"I woke up in bed in just my panties and t-shirt…" Carter answered and added, "Wet…"

Frasier logically asked the next question, "If you did I think you would've remembered something like that?" She sat a moment and added, "Even drunk…"

"I don't know we were pretty smashed that night." Sam admitted and went on, "I remember undoing his pants and my hand touching him inside them…"

"That didn't mean you went down on him…" Janet comforted her and observed, "Knowing you…you would have stopped yourself then…" She paused and guessed, "Or the Colonel would have…Jack has too much regard for you and respect to just put you and your career at risk."

"But I didn't even kiss him first…" Carter was humiliated and asked, "What does that make me?"

"That proves it right there." Frasier figured out, "Knowing you two you would've kissed first…the colonel would want that…" She assured her, "He's very protective of you Sam…you know that…" She predicted, "And you two would've been kissing and making out a while before you moved to that automatically." Then she finally asked, "Did you ask him what happened?"

Sam shook her head and replied, "He wouldn't tell me exactly what happened. It was obvious he just didn't want to and told me nothing happened."

"Well my advice is you ask him in detail what did happen before you get all panicked about something and act stupid." She told her bluntly and then she asked, "Do you want me to ask him?"

"No Janet…" Carter stood up, "That won't be necessary…" She opened the door, "I'll talk to him in private…"

"Good girl…" Janet said with relief as she left, "And tell me when you do know…"


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Stargate SG1, characters, settings etc. are property of their owners. No copyright infringement is intended. Original characters and plots are property of the author. No profit is being made from the fiction.

**Funny Circumstance**  
by Adelie King

**Chapter Three: Clarification**

Carter was out into the hall and O'Neill was heading in her direction. He stopped in front of her, "Carter…can I talk to you?" he requested and added, "In private with no cameras?" His hands tucked in his pockets and he looked at her seriously.

"Yes Sir…" She didn't argue and he led her into one of the closets.

He closed the door and locked it just in case. Jack then asked her, "Now will you let me tell you what happened and let me finish?"

"Yes Sir…" Sam agreed and demanded, "But I want to know everything in detail."

"Not a problem…" O'Neill held his hands up defensively and told her more clear, "You did not go down on me…you passed out on my lap just before."

"What do you mean just before?" She asked, "What did I do?"

He had to explain and started, "We made a couple of dirty jokes…then you undid my pants and slipped your hand in my fly."

"So I did touch you?"

"Yes…" Jack clarified, "You felt me over and I was trying to stop you…then…"

"Then…" She looked at him putting your hands on her hips.

"You passed out on my lap and I put you to bed." He assured her.

Sam still wasn't completely convinced and looked at him her face unchanged, "Yeah right?"

His hands went up defensively "If you don't believe me…" Jack then challenged, "Describe my dick to me…" He logically pointed out, "If you had gone down on me then that photographic memory of yours will recall a detailed description."

Carter didn't think that was half bad for him using logic like that but asked, "How do I know you're telling the truth?"

"I wouldn't lie to you." O'Neill reminded her, "You know that…"

"Okay…" She thought real hard and estimated, "I think you were around seven inches and decently thick girth…"

"See…think…" He observed, "You used the word 'think'…which indicates you didn't see it because you would've described it flat out…" Jack then paused and indicated, "and guess what…I'm bigger than that…"

Her eyes grew from shock and she crossed her arms and teased, "I don't know…most men will lie about their size generally…"

"Well I have no reason to I assure you…" O'Neill just about bragged that moment and then his hands went to the seal of his pants, "You want me to show you?"

"Uh?" She couldn't answer and then stuttered, "Sir."

He undid his button and was unzipping his fly, "You don't look convinced to me Carter…" Jack's tone was playful but cynical, "So you leave me no other option…" He warned his hand reaching into his fly.

She finally panicked. "NO!!" Carter reacted with her hands up, "I believe you Sir…" She was finally convinced, "You don't have to do that."

Having fun he teased a little longer, "You wanted to see it on Saturday the way your hand was in my pants…" He gestured like he was wrapping his hand around his shaft like he was going to pull it out.

"NO! Don't take it out!" Sam turned around covering her eyes.

O'Neill started chuckling when he re-zipped his fly, "You're hilarious Carter…you can handle almost anything but the minute I threaten to whip it out you panic."

She turned back around and commented, "You're really funny Sir. Is exposing your penis a favorite past time of yours…"

He tucked his hands in his pockets and replied, "No just threatening to for my 2IC who can't handle a joke is." Jack grinned and asked, "How long have you been in the military Carter?" He paused and finished, "And you still haven't gotten used to it."

"Some jokes are just not funny Sir and that was one of them…" Sam told him in a deadly serious tone. "Was leading me to believe I did something Saturday one of them too?"

"No." O'Neill made this clear to her, "I never led you to believe you did anything." He pointed out, "You convinced yourself of that without any help from me." He finally clarified, "Nothing happened except what you believed in your own head. You may have joked, you unzipped my fly, you handled me but you didn't go down on me or anything else. You passed out before you even pulled it out of my fly." Jack smiled and told her, "You were so cute when you did that."

"So what about me waking up in my panties and T-shirt with no bra..?" She crossed her arms waiting for an answer.

"I only removed your jeans and sandals…" He stated and theorized, "Your bra I have no clue because I never touched it so you must have removed that."

She was finally convinced, "Okay…so nothing really happened then?"

"Nothing…we didn't even kiss…" Jack clarified and admitted looking down a moment, "That I at least wish did happen." He tucked his hands in his pockets, "If anything…" He looked back up at her.

Sam finally smiled and hinted, "Well maybe it will soon…for real…" She paused and added, "And not from some viral influence like before."

He finally asked, "So are we cool now?" He raised his eyebrows, "Are you not worried about what happened anymore?"

"No."

"Good." Jack took her hands gently in his and stepped closer to her, "So when do I get to kiss you?" He asked in a gentle tone.

"When I'm ready and I won't be for a while Sir…" She told him and explained, "I don't know exactly how I feel about you yet and I want to be sure first."

"You ever let anything just happen without thinking it through Carter?" He inquired with disappointment.

"Not usually…" Carter answered directly, "And the last time I did Saturday happened…I just prefer to avoid that from happening again for a while if you don't mind Sir." She pulled her hands out of his, "I can't deal with the guilt and embarrassment again."

Jack understood completely how much this bothered her and didn't argue, "I can see that…" She was about to open the door and he called her, "Carter…" She looked at him and he assured her, "I would've stopped you anyway…I would never do anything to hurt you or embarrass you in any way."

"I know that now Sir." Sam smiled and promised him, "And I do plan to kiss you in the near future…" She opened the door and looked at him once more, "And I want it to happen without thought first." She didn't tell him exactly when and she left him with hopes for the future. Jack just prayed it was sometime soon.


End file.
